Sweet Talk

Sep 06, 2023

We often underestimate the power of our words in our marriages.

The other person is always around and so it's easy to speak to them as familiar, just there, or perhaps slightly annoying. Herein is opportunity for some fine-tuning. An opportunity to tweak something that can reap huge dividends in an evening, a week, a life. 

Think of it: How you speak matters. The words you choose matter. With them you can create hope and happiness and with them you can discourage and depress. You can be careless with them, or careful with them. You can sow life or death, create space for change or create despair and dismay. 

It's a matter of noticing, of being aware of your effect and adjusting your words and tone in a moment. It's about being intentional in honoring your spouse and speaking to their heart in a chosen way. If our normal speaking is caused by familiarity / annoyance, speaking better comes from focusing on their value, their identity, their specialness.

Today, put a higher estimate on the power of the words you speak. 


  • Set a reminder on your phone to chime every hour you're at home, "Am I coming across the way I want to right now?" And then adjust
  • Ask your partner about how you speak to them. What stands out as good effect / bad effect?
  • After conversations pause to evaluate what worked and what seemed not to
  • Have a date to "talk about your talking". No defenses! For both of you, what do you like and what don't you? What can you agree to change?


Photo by Danie Franco on Unsplash


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